One-on-One Archives - The Teachings Of Joshua
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By | Kyla, One-on-One


I’ve reached a point where I understand cognitively that I create my own reality, and I’m slowly getting to a point where I feel it and even believe it. I’ve been focusing on feeling good and reminding myself that there is no wrong anywhere in the Universe. I find myself clinging to those words as I await a decision which I feel will have a huge impact on my life and those of my children.

I see evidence of my growth in the way I am handling this divorce process. There have been several manifestation events where I’ve managed to shift my perspective of things I initially perceived as negative, instead viewing them as positive events happening for me. I’ve identified limiting beliefs such as “It’s important for others to view me as a good person” and “I must comply with the wishes of others in order to feel safe” and “Others can create in my reality.”

I’ve been finding ways to reduce the intensity of those beliefs, and overall I’m feeling better more of the time than ever before. But, I still find fear cropping up around the recommendation that will soon be issued by a court-ordered mediator regarding who (either my former partner or myself) will be the primary caregiver for our children.

My belief (perhaps a limiting one?) is that my children truly would be better served with me as their primary caregiver, therefore I am having trouble detaching from the outcome. How can I best prepare myself to receive this decision in a way that is aligned with my inner self, regardless of what the decision may be?

And a follow-up…even if I get the decision I perceive as “good”, i.e. that I remain the primary caregiver, another limiting belief I would like to release is that my former partner will contest it and we will end up in court. I would love to get to a place where I feel good no matter what directions this all takes…any suggestions?

Thank so much!

With love,

Dear Kyla,

We are in awe of your awareness. You understand the mechanism of physical reality in terms that few know. You are a leading-edge thinker and we are delighted to embark upon this journey with you. We completely understand the place you find yourself in right now and we must put forth to you once again that this is the perfect place to start. You have raised your vibration high enough to have found us and now we are engaged in conversation. You have done the thinking and feeling work necessary to prepare yourself for the divorce and custody process. Now it’s all a matter of managing your vibration in the thick of it.

First, we will begin at the basis of all creation; your vibration. Your vibration includes within it all of your desires. It radiates out to the universe and the universe responds. You are the center of your universe, therefore the universe responds to whatever it is that you want regardless of the desires of others. Remember that the universe is focused on you and you can receive all that you want if you allow it.

Let’s imagine that you want two things; whatever is best for your children and to be their primary caregiver. Which of these desires holds more weight for you? One of them outweighs the other. Above all, you want what’s best for your children. If that entails you being their primary caregiver, then that’s wonderful. However, if that does not happen, you will still be concerned for their overall well-being. You truly want what’s best for them. This is your primary concern.

Therefore, the universe is responding to this most important desire; the well-being of your children. You can now be assured that the universe is working this out for you, for them, and even for your ex. It is all happening for you. You simply allow it to happen without resistance. If you are awarded custody, that decision is best for your children. If your ex is awarded custody, then that decision is best for your children. If it is best for them, then it is best for you, even if you can’t see it right now.

Your children chose their parents and the time and place of their birth. They made this choice because they intended certain things before they were born. They knew that their childhood with you as their parents would launch them on a trajectory to a life experience that would provide them with the basis of exploration and expansion. This divorce process is part of that trajectory.

We would not be speaking in such detail to most people, but we believe you are ready for this leading-edge conversation. It is important for you to go into this with the higher perspective. What is best for your children cannot be known by you at this time. If you were to coerce this situation so that you got what you think you want, you might alter your children’s’ trajectory. You might unknowingly cause an event which would disrupt their paths. What is best for them is also best for you, you just can’t see that from where you stand right now.

We are not saying it will be best for them to stay with you or with your ex. What we are saying is that whatever happens will be best for them and for you. If it turns out that they stay with you, you can know that this is the best possible outcome for all concerned. If they stay with your ex, you can be assured this is the best possible outcome for all concerned. It may not seem like it now, but from the higher perspective, it will be rather obvious. From the future, looking back at this time, it will be rather obvious and from that vantage point, you will be grateful that things happened as they did.

So then, what are you to do now? How are you to manage your vibration during this process? You are to become an allower. You are to feel good during the process. Most of those around you will not feel good. You will struggle to feel good. But feeling good and being in a positive emotional state of being will yield far better results. When you are aligned with the higher perspective while in the midst of turmoil, you will have access to higher level thoughts and ideas. You will say the right thing at the right time. You will be seen as reasonable and responsible. Others, including your ex, will feel comfortable around you and will feel your inner strength and calm. You will be received as powerful.

If you were to hold onto the limited perspective and allow yourself to be consumed with fear, you would sink into the lower emotional state of resistance. From this state of being you have access to lower-vibrational thoughts and ideas. You will come across as fearful and desperate. You will say and do things that contradict who you really are. You will not have the leverage of the universe backing you up. You will cut yourself off from the support that is being formed around you.

By accepting that whatever happens is in the best interest of your children, you adopt the higher perspective and you remain aligned with what you want and who you really are. From this stance you are incredibly powerful, persuasive and attractive. You attract what it is you want. From this stance you move into the easy state of allowing where everything you want can easily flow to you. From this state you are non-resistant and you project calm, ease, confidence and love. By projecting love, you will receive love. By being calm, you will receive calm. Non-resistance is extremely powerful in a situation like this.

The best way to alleviate the fear you feel is by trusting that it is all working out and by having faith in the mechanism of physical reality. This is your world. This is your experience. As long as you do not resist it, it must all be working out for you. You are loved more than you could imagine and supported by more than you could count.