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KYLA QUESTION #1

By | Kyla, One-on-One | No Comments

Joshua,

I’ve reached a point where I understand cognitively that I create my own reality, and I’m slowly getting to a point where I feel it and even believe it. I’ve been focusing on feeling good and reminding myself that there is no wrong anywhere in the Universe. I find myself clinging to those words as I await a decision which I feel will have a huge impact on my life and those of my children.

I see evidence of my growth in the way I am handling this divorce process. There have been several manifestation events where I’ve managed to shift my perspective of things I initially perceived as negative, instead viewing them as positive events happening for me. I’ve identified limiting beliefs such as “It’s important for others to view me as a good person” and “I must comply with the wishes of others in order to feel safe” and “Others can create in my reality.”

I’ve been finding ways to reduce the intensity of those beliefs, and overall I’m feeling better more of the time than ever before. But, I still find fear cropping up around the recommendation that will soon be issued by a court-ordered mediator regarding who (either my former partner or myself) will be the primary caregiver for our children.

My belief (perhaps a limiting one?) is that my children truly would be better served with me as their primary caregiver, therefore I am having trouble detaching from the outcome. How can I best prepare myself to receive this decision in a way that is aligned with my inner self, regardless of what the decision may be?

And a follow-up…even if I get the decision I perceive as “good”, i.e. that I remain the primary caregiver, another limiting belief I would like to release is that my former partner will contest it and we will end up in court. I would love to get to a place where I feel good no matter what directions this all takes…any suggestions?

Thank so much!

With love,
Kyla


Dear Kyla,

We are in awe of your awareness. You understand the mechanism of physical reality in terms that few know. You are a leading-edge thinker and we are delighted to embark upon this journey with you. We completely understand the place you find yourself in right now and we must put forth to you once again that this is the perfect place to start. You have raised your vibration high enough to have found us and now we are engaged in conversation. You have done the thinking and feeling work necessary to prepare yourself for the divorce and custody process. Now it’s all a matter of managing your vibration in the thick of it.

First, we will begin at the basis of all creation; your vibration. Your vibration includes within it all of your desires. It radiates out to the universe and the universe responds. You are the center of your universe, therefore the universe responds to whatever it is that you want regardless of the desires of others. Remember that the universe is focused on you and you can receive all that you want if you allow it.

Let’s imagine that you want two things; whatever is best for your children and to be their primary caregiver. Which of these desires holds more weight for you? One of them outweighs the other. Above all, you want what’s best for your children. If that entails you being their primary caregiver, then that’s wonderful. However, if that does not happen, you will still be concerned for their overall well-being. You truly want what’s best for them. This is your primary concern.

Therefore, the universe is responding to this most important desire; the well-being of your children. You can now be assured that the universe is working this out for you, for them, and even for your ex. It is all happening for you. You simply allow it to happen without resistance. If you are awarded custody, that decision is best for your children. If your ex is awarded custody, then that decision is best for your children. If it is best for them, then it is best for you, even if you can’t see it right now.

Your children chose their parents and the time and place of their birth. They made this choice because they intended certain things before they were born. They knew that their childhood with you as their parents would launch them on a trajectory to a life experience that would provide them with the basis of exploration and expansion. This divorce process is part of that trajectory.

We would not be speaking in such detail to most people, but we believe you are ready for this leading-edge conversation. It is important for you to go into this with the higher perspective. What is best for your children cannot be known by you at this time. If you were to coerce this situation so that you got what you think you want, you might alter your children’s’ trajectory. You might unknowingly cause an event which would disrupt their paths. What is best for them is also best for you, you just can’t see that from where you stand right now.

We are not saying it will be best for them to stay with you or with your ex. What we are saying is that whatever happens will be best for them and for you. If it turns out that they stay with you, you can know that this is the best possible outcome for all concerned. If they stay with your ex, you can be assured this is the best possible outcome for all concerned. It may not seem like it now, but from the higher perspective, it will be rather obvious. From the future, looking back at this time, it will be rather obvious and from that vantage point, you will be grateful that things happened as they did.

So then, what are you to do now? How are you to manage your vibration during this process? You are to become an allower. You are to feel good during the process. Most of those around you will not feel good. You will struggle to feel good. But feeling good and being in a positive emotional state of being will yield far better results. When you are aligned with the higher perspective while in the midst of turmoil, you will have access to higher level thoughts and ideas. You will say the right thing at the right time. You will be seen as reasonable and responsible. Others, including your ex, will feel comfortable around you and will feel your inner strength and calm. You will be received as powerful.

If you were to hold onto the limited perspective and allow yourself to be consumed with fear, you would sink into the lower emotional state of resistance. From this state of being you have access to lower-vibrational thoughts and ideas. You will come across as fearful and desperate. You will say and do things that contradict who you really are. You will not have the leverage of the universe backing you up. You will cut yourself off from the support that is being formed around you.

By accepting that whatever happens is in the best interest of your children, you adopt the higher perspective and you remain aligned with what you want and who you really are. From this stance you are incredibly powerful, persuasive and attractive. You attract what it is you want. From this stance you move into the easy state of allowing where everything you want can easily flow to you. From this state you are non-resistant and you project calm, ease, confidence and love. By projecting love, you will receive love. By being calm, you will receive calm. Non-resistance is extremely powerful in a situation like this.

The best way to alleviate the fear you feel is by trusting that it is all working out and by having faith in the mechanism of physical reality. This is your world. This is your experience. As long as you do not resist it, it must all be working out for you. You are loved more than you could imagine and supported by more than you could count.

Joshua

Astrid – Septeber 23, 2016

By | Family and Friends, Joshua Answers | No Comments

Hi Joshua,
I am stuck on the thought that I hurt other people. I know on some logical level that we are all responsible for our own feelings, but I still restrain myself in what I say and do because I am so worried that I will be the cause of other people feeling bad. I know their reaction to me is based more around themselves and their beliefs than on my actions, but I still feel a huge amount of pain when I think about how I could hurt them if I say the wrong thing.
It is extremely painful to me and very limiting as this fear is strong in all my interactions, from the postman to my friends and family. I worry about this before every encounter, during and especially after I meet them. It is just so hard to accept that I might be causing pain, I don’t want to do that! I tell myself I am just a tool for the Universe to help them see their own limiting beliefs but is that really true? My feelings around this seem to live their own life even if I tell myself I am overreacting.
Is this just a matter of repeating and learning a new way to think about how my action cannot hurt other people? Is it always our own fault when we feel bad? I was also wondering if there is a certain energy transferred in your answers to me? I always feel better just reading it, even if the subject might not be resolved.
Thank you!
Astrid

Dear Astrid,
You are absolutely right. You have nothing to fear about causing someone else pain by saying something that might be upsetting. If you said it, the other person needed to hear it. You would not say it if it wasn’t needed. We are all tools of the universe. You could not be talking to us now if you did not need to hear what we have to say. We are a tool of the universe and so are you. We are inspired to say things and so are you. If we were to say something and that caused you pain, it would be due to the fact that you are thinking about our words in a way that is not aligned with who you really are or what you really want.
You have an inner guidance system. When you hear praise, you feel good because your perspective is fully aligned with your inner self’s perspective. You feel good about yourself and your inner self feels good about you as well. When you hear criticism and you feel negative emotion, the emotion is telling you that you are looking at yourself from a perspective that is limiting. Your inner self is looking at you as who you really are and so the two perspectives do not match. That’s why you feel negative emotion. Once you accept this and choose a higher perspective, you’ll feel better.
You can only have hurt feelings if your persona is attacked. Over the years, starting as a child, you developed a persona. It is your idea of who you are, however it is completely false. You might think you are attractive, intelligent, loving, caring, respectable, honest, fun to be around, and so on. This is all false. Of course you are these things and more, but these traits do not define you, they limit you. Who you really are is a limitless being of pure positive love and acceptance. Nothing is higher than that. You limit yourself by believing that your personality defines you.
If you think you are intelligent and someone questions your intelligence, you feel negative emotion and your feelings get hurt. Who cares what they think? Nothing defines you because you are a limitless being of pure positive love. That’s who you really are. Would a being of pure positive love and acceptance care if someone thought they were not intelligent? Of course not. They would accept their statement with love and move on.
If you say something that hurts another, it is simply because they are attached to some false aspect of themselves. The negative emotion is really fear. They are fearful that something they believe about themselves, which they think defines them, is not true. Of course it isn’t true, yet this fact is scary to some people. It is held in place by a limiting belief and that belief must be shattered for them to receive that which they want. It is simply not possible for you to say or do anything wrong. All situations are set up in advance. Nothing is random. There are no accidents. If you are there, you are meant to be there. If you say something, you are meant to say it. If they receive it badly, they have a limiting belief that must be challenged. You quite literally do them a disservice by not saying something you are inspired to say. If you said it, they needed to hear it. If they choose to make you wrong for saying it, then they are simply resisting the very important message you have to offer.
There is no wrong anywhere in the universe and it is not possible for you to be wrong either.
With all our love,
We are Joshua