I’m 37 and I have been trying to conceive a much wanted baby with my fiancé Charlie over the past few years. We have been through a round of IVF and we got 5 embryos. 4 didn’t implant which at the time was quite distressing and my last embryo implanted and I became pregnant but I sadly miscarried at 7 weeks. I really do feel like I’m meant to be a mother to at least two children and I’m wondering if I’m having to raise my vibration to let these children come in. I have been listening to your pod casts and I feel that I have found you so I can heal somehow from this journey. I do understand that everything is happening for me but in the quiet moments I’m also wanting to build my own family of light and I can feel quite overwhelmed with sadness. I do feel like myself and my partner have got stronger and we have learnt a lot together. I would love Joshua to please give me their perspective on this and if they see children for me and my intuition is right here? Also just any other advice or comments on this subject and anything they feel would benefit me.
Many many thanks
We will start by saying that everything is right. From the higher perspective, there is no wrong anywhere in the universe. Everything that has happened has occurred for your benefit and growth as you intended prior to your birth. All is working out perfectly. From a limited perspective, we understand how you can see the events that have occurred to be wrong. You imagine that if the pregnancy resulted in the birth of a baby, that your desire would have manifested. From your perspective, it seems as if things are not working out for you. This is an illusion for everything is working out perfectly. From a higher perspective gained after a period of time, you will understand how everything happened perfectly.
You have birthed a very strong desire to have children and a family. You imagine what this family will mean to you and so it seems as if a family must come. And in order to manifest this family that is not in your reality now, you perceive that something is wrong. In fact, nothing is wrong. However, from your limited perspective based in the wrongness of what seems to be happening (or not happening) you sink into a lower emotional state of being. In this state, you receive urges to change the conditions and so you effort and struggle to have a baby and nothing works. How could this be?
In this reality, you can absolutely have, be and do anything you desire. All you have to do is become a vibrational match to the desire. You do not become a match by trying to make things happen on your own. All creation is the result of cultivating a vibration that matches your desire. Since your desire is based in love, the best way to match the vibration of that desire is to come to a place of pure love. Love equals acceptance. Therefore, in order to accomplish the vibration of love, you must accept the conditions as they are. You can no longer wish for the conditions to be different; for this is the vibration of fear.
The vibration of love is acceptance. The vibration of fear is control. If you create desires based in fear, you will experience manifestation events that allow you to glimpse the fear-based vibration you are offering. Things will seem like they aren’t working out and you will feel negative emotion. In the vibration of love, you learn to completely accept yourself as you are, all other people as they are and the conditions of the present moment, all past events, and all future events as perfect as they are. This is the vibration of ease, acceptance and allowing. This vibration will allow the universe to manifest all the desires you intended to pursue prior to your birth into this reality.
You must accept that all that has happened in the past has happened by design so that you could be at this vibration right now. In this moment, you are asking a vital question and our answer will literally change the course of your life. You will expand as a result of asking this question and receiving our answer. However, you must also accept that everything will unfold in the future perfectly as well. You want to know how things will turn out, but that is entirely up to you and the vibration you choose to cultivate: one of fear or one of acceptance. You will expand. Maybe through the experience of a baby being born to you. Maybe through the experience of a baby being born to someone else, but is now in your life, or maybe to the experience of not having your own children. Whatever the future holds and whatever is or is not manifested will be perfect for you in this experience of the life of Sarah.
You perceive that the only way for you to be happy is to have a baby. This is not the case. You are in conflict. You want to control the conditions. You want to do whatever it takes to manifest a baby. You are not alone in this pursuit. Most people try to make their desires come true on their own. They effort and struggle and manifest something, but it is not what they intended and so the manifestation actually turns out to be nothing like they imagined. This is what happens when humans try to manipulate conditions on their own to manifest what they think they want. This is not an effective way to approach life. What you truly want will come to you if you allow it. What you do not want will come to you if you try to control the manifestation process. Even this question that you have written is a form of control. You are using our answer to control the outcome of your desire. Again, control will never, has never and can never work. This is a universe based in love, giving you everything you truly desire. When you try to outsmart the universe, you create manifestation events designed to show you where your limiting beliefs are found. They are found within your idea of control.
So then, how is the best way to manifest a baby. It’s to completely give up any meaning you perceive the baby will present to you. If you perceive that the baby will make you feel loved, but you do not already feel love, it will not. If you perceive the baby will make you feel worthy or whole and you do not feel those things now, it won’t work. The opposite will be true. You must come to accept that if a baby comes, it will not change your ability to love and accept yourself. If it comes, it will not make you whole, good or worthy. It will have no impact on your life other than how you feel now. Until you accept yourself as you are, the condition as they are, and the people in your life as they are, you really do not want to have a baby.
If you cannot love yourself, the conditions and other people in your life unconditionally, how will you be able to love a child unconditionally? If you cannot accept that the universe is binging you everything you need when you need it, how will you ever allow the universe to do the same for your child? Your child, if there is one, will want to be born into a family of love, not fear. If you can manage the vibration of love, fully accepting the outcome whatever it may be, you will maintain the vibration of love. In this vibration, your true desire will manifest into your life. It might be a baby and it might be something else entirely. However, as you gain the vibration of love, anything and everything that manifests will feel so, so good to you. This is what you truly want.
With our love,
We are Joshua