Dear Joshua,

Thank you Joshua for the understanding I KNOW I will receive! I am struggling at present with aligning myself with being a working Mum. This work is not just about earning money, but about doing MY thing, finding my way and being me. I have found work that fits around my kids but every time I get some work to do one or both are ill! I can see that there is something in this for me to learn, about believing that I can be a good mother and work too. And I am working on that belief. But I also understand that kids sometimes just need time away from school, and can at times believe they are ill because they would prefer to be at home. My question really lies in how I allow my children to find their own way, be themselves, and not force them to conform, and still be able to work and do MY thing? I am struggling to see how it would all fit together.

In love,

Dear Kirsten,

What you must remember is that this is your reality. What comes to you, what you perceive in your world, is a reflection of your point of attraction. While it may seem as if your children are getting ill just when you have some work, it is simply the Law of Attraction filling in the pieces. Here’s how it works.

You want to be a good mother above all else. You are a good mother, yet you have doubt in this area, especially when you go to work. You feel as though you’re not as good of a mother as you could be while at work and so you ask for the feelings of being a good mother. When you ask, the universe delivers. The path of least resistance to satisfy your request is for your children tobecome ill. In their illness, you feel like a good mother.

Nothing makes you feel better about yourself as a mother than taking care of a sick child. The universe knows this and as you feel maternally insecure, the universe responds with what you need to make yourself feel better; a sick child to care for. The child does not have that much to do with it. While the illness may offer some benefit to the child, had you not needed reassurance, your child would not have gotten ill. It is you who is responsible for your child’s illness.

Now, this gets a little complicated because you know that you cannot create in another’s reality. If your child did not receive benefit from the illness (getting out of school, getting to be alone with you, resting, etc.) the child could not get ill. However, you have come together in this cocreative dance because each of you receives benefit from the illness. Of course these illnesses are very mild. Now, if you chose to stay at work rather than go home to care for your child, and felt guilty about it, it’s quite possible that your child’s illness would become more severe.

Your children and most children in general will use mild illnesses as a response to stress. When they feel overwhelmed, they seek the comfort their parents provide. Because illness is a valid excuse to leave school for a day or two, they must become ill. However, if you were to set up an agreement that your children could leave school whenever it got too much for them, they could do so without needing to become sick first. This might be a very healthy protocol to adopt in your household. If they understand that they are free to take time off from school whenever they need it, then there will be no need for them to get sick. They can instead enjoy healthy days at home rather than sick days. Wouldn’t that be more fun?

Now that we responded to your children’s needs, let’s take a look at what you are wanting out of this situation. You enjoy comforting and caring for your children when they are ill. This makes you feel like a good mother. When you are not feeling like a good mother, they become ill so you can comfort and care for them and feel good about being a good mother. Had you felt like a good mother, you would not need to do anything for them and they would not necessarily become ill. Because you needed the feeling (and because they were also going to get something from it) the universe caused them to become ill.

So then, let’s address how you feel. Are you a good mother? Of course you are. Can you think of any examples that prove you’re a good mother? Of course you can. Is it natural for all mothers to feel lack in this area? Of course it is. Do you need your children to get sick in order for you to feel like a good mother? Of course not. Are there good mothers in the world who also have jobs, careers, passions, interests, goals, things to achieve, and a difference to make in the world? Of course there are. Can you be a good mother while simultaneously pursuing your interests andpassions? Of course you can. Can you be a good mother and also work? Of course you can.

Realize that these feelings are natural, but understand that they are tied to a limiting belief and that belief is based in fear. If the belief is based in fear, it is not true. It is a false belief. You can work and you are a good mother whether you work or not. The work makes you a better mother. it provides an example of alignment that your children need to witness. When you deny yourself your freedom to pursue what interests you, you transfer your limiting beliefs to your children and in doing so, you do them a disservice.

You children have come here to explore certain aspects of this world. They chose you as their mother. They chose the time and place of their birth. They chose to be born into this environment because it provides them with a trajectory that will allow them to pursue their interests and passions. They chose a mother who knew more about the powers of the universe and the mechanism of physical reality. They want you to be an example they can follow. They may not know it now. It may not be what they want now. But, by you being aligned with who you really are, you give them an example to follow. They want to become who they really are and in that respect, they want to emulate you.

You are loved more than you can imagine,