I am having a manifestation event right now and I am not doing a particularly good job at reducing my fears. I am too wrapped up in my anger. From the outside, it may look like a minor manifestation event that shouldn’t produce so much anger, but I guess there is a lot of momentum here.
I was making plans for dinner during our Easter holiday and decided I wanted to make turkey on one of the days. So I said to my mate: “Should we have turkey on this day? There is a lot of food, so maybe we should invite someone? My brother and his family (3 people) or maybe your parents, since your brother and his family are on holiday?”
We decided on his parents because we wanted to do something nice for them. My mate’s oldest brother died at the age of 51, 6 months ago, so they are still grieving. His older brother did not have a wife or children and was not the happiest of men or a person that was easy to love, so we haven’t really been so close to my mate’s brothers. This is not because of me, but because my mate did not really care to be around them. That has changed now that his older brother died and he has suddenly started to care more about his family. I play nice when we are with them, like I always do, but I do not like to be around them very much.
Anyway, my mate was at his parent’s house today, while I was grocery shopping for the holiday and he phoned and asked how many people we could seat for dinner, because he wanted to invite his brother with his family too. His brother has 4 children, two of them adults with girlfriends, and two smaller ones.
So instead of having a quiet turkey dinner with his parents, I now have to cook for maybe 14 people. I don’t even know if the turkey is big enough or if we have enough food… and where to seat everybody?
I think the reason that I am so angry is because my mate has no idea what it takes to make this dinner and that this also represents that he has no idea the amount of work it takes to magically have dinner on the table every day, 365 days a year. It has not been a big concern for my mate and I do not feel that my efforts are appreciated, because I do not do what is really important in life and that is earning a big salary!
I know, there are so many fears here, but the thing is, I am not able to reduce any of these fears because I am “enjoying” the anger too much. It does not feel bad to be angry, it feels good in a weird way! I am angry at my mate, at his parents (I am sure his mother made the suggestion to invite his other brother) at his brother and wife, because they have always criticised us and I have felt that I was never behaving how they wanted me to and I am angry at myself for suggesting this dinner in the first place when I could have bought pre-made pizza and enjoyed a good novel instead of cooking dinner for an ungrateful bunch. I do not want an argument with my mate, so I am now sitting in my bedroom ranting to you. Sorry for that!
After our last conversation I was so motivated to deal with my fears when I had a manifestation event, so I am a little depressed also that I am not able to reduce my fears, because I am so wrapped up in my anger.
What a wonderful manifestation at this perfect time. You have been progressing so well and now you find yourself in the middle of something that seems so bad and so wrong, that it causes you to feel intense anger. This anger feels worse than normal because you are being a little hard on yourself. Don’t worry about that. That is all part of the process. As you get good at choosing your perspective and feeling better, when manifestation events happen, they feel even worse than before and you blame yourself for not being able to move through the fear and process it like you know you can. In these times, it’s best to just take it easier on yourself and very quickly, you’ll find a higher perspective.?
Here’s where you get to practice your authenticity. It doesn’t mean that you become authentic and tell everyone how you truthfully feel. It means that you become a being of love and acceptance and accept that this is all happening for you, because it is. To you, it seems inauthentic of the family to suddenly be in grief for a brother that no one cared for and so now this bonding seems fake. Yet, what is really happening within that side of the family is great sadness for abandoning the older brother. They never thought this would happen and now this experience is causing them to feel like they should be closer to each other. This is actually a very good thing and a way that they can heal some old wounds. And you get to be a part of it.
Looking at it from our perspective, it all makes so much sense. Of course they all come to your house. Of course you get to be the one to provide the comfort in the form of food and hospitality. Of course they are gravitating to you. Your vibration is the highest. It cannot be helped. You are going to be their example of alignment. This is all working out for you and if you can see the whole thing from our perspective, your life is going to change dramatically.
First, we would like to talk more about the concept of being appreciated. You want to feel appreciated, but your focus of attention is on the lack of appreciation. You notice when they don’t appreciate you, not when they do. It is a very good thing to appreciate being appreciated, but you cannot make others appreciate you in any specific way. That’s trying to control the conditions. All you can do is have the desire to be appreciated and let the universe put you in situations where you have the opportunity to notice when people appreciate you. This is a perfect situation for that. What are the odds? 100%
Instead of resenting them for not thinking about you and asking you to do something you do not want to do, lean into it and make the experience work for you. Your habit has been to grump and moan about situations like these so that people will not expect you to have to do all the work. Again, that was trying to control the conditions and as you know, it doesn’t work. This event came to you, which means it’s for you. It’s for your benefit. It came at the most perfect time. It could not be any better.
So how does one lean into this event? First, think about who you really are; a limitless being of pure positive love and acceptance. You accept that this event is for you. You accept that the people involved in the event are perfect as they are and you will not ask them to be different than they are. You acknowledge that they may or may not appreciate your efforts and that will be fine with you. You will not expect them to. But you are going to put forth your best effort, not because you want anything in return, but because you want to express your love for these people. That is the authentic version of you and you are there now, even if sometimes you don’t realize it.
So plan for many people. Buy enough food so that they will all have to take something home. Be bold and daring. Make several things. Pretend you’re Martha Stewart. Decorate like you’ve never done before. Set up place cards with everyone’s name on it. Buy each guest a small and personal gift. Go above and beyond anything you would ever do. Express your love. Make it fun. Make it interesting and exciting. Think of all the fun things you could do. Change your old approach to something like this and adopt the new approach that you have moved into. This is what being authentic is all about.
It may turn out to be a big flop. You might burn everything. They might think you’ve gone mad. It doesn’t matter. You will be aligned with who you really are and they will notice this. They might even like it. It might get them out of their grief. Who knows? One of the kids might even appreciate it and learn something from your example. Wouldn’t that be nice?
You are so more powerful and influential that you can imagine. We are looking forward to seeing you in action!
With our love,
We are Joshua