I feel as though I’ve come to a point on my spiritual path, somewhat a point of awakening. But it’s not really an awakening, it’s more of a realisation of who and what I am and what I am doing. I realise it all, I see it all, but however hard I try, I cannot truly wake from it all. Because I am it, and to break away would mean to lose myself.
So I find myself lost. Why am I here? Why are we here? To live this dream asleep? Or to be awake in the dream, watching it all unfold, only to do nothing, to be able to do nothing, and our purpose is actually to do nothing? To accept and surrender to it all, as it is. Love.
In times of hardship, I often tell myself, it’s all happening for a reason, but that reason seems to elude me the more I progress and grow. The reason seems to me, at this point from my perspective, be in fact nothing. So what’s the point ? Why? Are we here?
What we came to tackle, seems an impossible task. “To make an impact” “change the world” “make it better.” How can we? When we cannot even tackle the demons within ourselves? I feel overcome with awareness, yet I feel so powerless in it all. And what is the point of awareness if we cannot allow ourselves then the power to change?
“We didn’t come here to change” you will say. We came to expand and grow. Into what? Nothing at the end of it all? So why must we live through these lives only to come back to what we were in the first place?
“We must accept ourselves.”
I accept that I am a being of light, who came to a messed up world, went through some messed up shit, and in the shit I grow, like manure on a field of corn, and then I blossom and bloom, to the point of complete awareness then I die, to go back to being a non physical being. Why?
“I chose this.”
Yep, I know. Yet I can’t understand why? Why would I choose this? This pain? This torment this hardship! Yes the light feels amazing and in those moments it feels amazing to have a body and be in this world. That’s why I practice yoga. My body just being in it, is a pleasure. Breathing is a gift! The miracle of life , is unfathomable. It all feels amazing yes. But why?
What is the point of it all?
Recently I look around at all I see and feel and experience, and think “none of this is real”
Yet in this world where nothing matters and nothing is real, I’m hurting, feeling pain at the same old things that triggers me. In this cycle, awake in a living dream. Powerless to change it, or stop it. Just watching this cycle unfold and unable to break away.
I feel depressed. But mostly I feel numb.
So this feeling indicates to me that what I am thinking does not align to my higher self.
So what is the limiting belief here?
That there is no point to life?
That there is hope?
That I need to keep the faith and carry on through the shit storms knowing it’s all happening for a reason?
That is to comeback to nothing? To non physical beings, for what? And there the cycles begin again.
My mind is tormenting me and your supportive logical words would help me very much I’m sure.
With all my Love,
Would it do any good to tell you that the point of life is to do exactly what you are doing? You came here to explore and expand through experience and you are currently doing that perfectly. What is the point of expansion? To become more.
When you imagine the idea of moving through experience, sometimes in suffering and sometimes in joy, you cannot understand the point of it all. It seems pointless and you feel negative emotion. You have just hit the nail on the head. You have just figured it all out. It’s all a matter of perspective.
From a limited perspective you perceive that there is no point to this life and you feel negative emotion. What does this tell you? If emotion is your guidance system at work, you can know for sure that when you choose a limited perspective, your inner self will never agree with you. All you are doing is choosing a limited perspective. From the higher perspective of your inner self, you can only perceive how wonderful and amazing your experience in physical reality is. It’s simply not possible to do that when you are holding onto a limited perspective. Your emotions let you know which perspective you are choosing.
Somehow you made your way to these teachings and you have come to an intellectual awareness of how the system of physical reality works and who you are. You are aware that you are a being of love. You are expanding through experience. You are becoming more and so is All That Is. You are conducting an exploration and you so much wanted to be here now. Why don’t you feel that now? Because you are attached to your limited perspective. Raise your perspective and all will fall into place.
The limiting belief is that you are not the creator of your reality, that you have no control over your life, and that you are not worthy of the life you desire. You effort and struggle to control your reality. In fact, you use these teachings to try to control your reality. You understand it all on an intellectual level, but you cannot seem to incorporate it into the fabric of your life. You are missing one large part in all of this. It is the idea of control.
You cannot control your conditions, you can only control you vibration. You are living an approach to life based in the total control of yourself, all others and the world around you. This approach can never work. You can feel like a victim as long as you like and wish for things to be different than they are, but until you stop seeking validation outside of you, you will never find relief. The only relief lies in the absolute acceptance of yourself, all others, and the conditions as they exist. Give up control and look at everything from the higher perspective.
Imagine that your child failed a class in school. What would your reaction be? It would be fear. You would perceive it as wrong. You would want to change the conditions. You would wish her grade was better. You would feel negative emotion. But your inner self would not feel this way and this is the reason you are receiving negative emotion. You would suffer through the expansion of this event needlessly. In the end, the failed grade would lead to something so beneficial, that you would thank the teacher for failing your child. But in the moment, you decide that it is wrong and you suffer through it. It is all due to a limited perspective caused by a limiting belief. So then, do you address the child, the teacher, or the limiting belief?
You may understand our teachings. You may agree with hat we have to say. But you have not done the work. You have not reduced the intensity of limiting beliefs. You still think some things are wrong. You have not changed your approach to life. You are still acting as a victim rather than the creator of your reality. If you know the information is true but do nothing to change your behavior, then you will be mired in conflict and suffering. You will make it worse on yourself. Until you incorporate what you know into the fabric of your life, you will remain in conflict and nothing will change. Until you do the actual, daily work to raise your vibration, nothing will change. Until you live in love instead of fear, nothing will change. Until you actually see things as good and right rather than wrong or bad, nothing will change. If you continue to disagree with your inner self and hold onto your limiting beliefs and self-imposed limitations, nothing will change. In fact, if you do nothing, your limiting beliefs will grow stronger and your perspective will grow more limited. And this will not feel good to you. It’s time for you to change? Are you ready to actually change? Will you finally do the work? We will see.
With our love,
We are Joshua