Dear Joshua,

I feel deep within my body that I’m disconnected with my partner, with whom I have two beautiful girls with (18 months & 4 years old). He’s a fab daddy and a wonderful man, but I want more. I don’t want to split my children away from him but it just doesn’t feel right anymore. I’m in a state of transition and know that I should keep going with ending the relationship, but I have no idea if this is the right thing I should do? How do I truly trust my instincts whilst making sure my children are kept centred? I’m also scared about the future as I’ve started my own business after following a path that doesn’t work for me for such a long time. I feel like I’m going mad!


Dear Christine,

How you feel about your partner is simply a representation of how you feel about yourself. Your partner is the perfect mirror to your feelings. You attracted him through the vibrational signal you were sending before your relationship began and he was a match to that signal then. How he is being in the relationship now matches the signal your are currently emitting. Change your vibrational signal and the relationship will change. Change your vibration and everything changes.

The problem with relationships that don’t appear to be working is that you are confused by the source of the problem. You assume it’s the other person, or the conditions you find yourself in, but the only problem is the signal you’re sending. Unfortunately, you are completely and absolutely responsible for it all. This is your universe.

It might be difficult for you to realize this, but you are at the center of your own unique universe. It might seem as if you are one individual in a sea of many, yet this is your universe and everyone else just plays a role in your experience of life. You control them all. You are not a victim of fate, you are the sole creator of your own reality whether you know it or not.

How anyone responds to you is simply a reflection of your feelings, beliefs, attitudes, expectations, fears and desires. The illusion on the outside is a reflection of the reality of the inside. How you feel is reflected back to you by your perception of the outside world. However, it is all happening on the inside first.

We would not change anything until we learned how to create what was wanted by focusing on feeling better. Feeling better leads to a better-feeling reality. How you feel is the only thing that really matters, so we would ask you to do whatever it takes to make yourself feel better in the present conditions before taking action to change those conditions.

The universe creates the conditions of your life from the vibrational signal you emit. When you take action to change the conditions because you feel they are wrong, you can change the conditions, at least for a little while. However, if you are emitting the same signal, new conditions will be created to match your same old vibration and the new conditions will seem remarkably similar to the old ones.

So we ask that you take a little time and think about what you are feeling. It might be productive to read a book on the subject of reality before taking action to change things. You will want to think about how you are feeling first. You want to think more about what truly interests you. Why do you want to do the things you’re planning to do? Do you think they will make you feel better? This would be going about it in reverse and will not work. The conditions are not here to make you feel better, they are simply a reflection of how you already feel. If you want the conditions to improve, you must feel better first.

The easiest way to feel better is by appreciating all the good things in your life now. There are no problems to solve. Everything is right the way it is. If you want things to improve in the future, you must alter your perspective. See all the good and ignore what you think is bad or wrong. Do this experiment and see what happens. Get a journal and write in it every day. Pick a few things you appreciate about your life and add those things to your journal. At the end of each day, read your journal from beginning to end. This will make you feel better. This will cause your vibration to rise. Your new vibrational level will cause a shift in your reality that will reflect that. Things will slowly start to look clearer and brighter. This is the position from which to make a decision about your future.

Always make decisions from high emotional states of being. Never make decisions when you feel bad. Elevate your state of being and the decisions made from this stance will be the right ones.

You are doing very well and you are loved more than you could imagine.