Hi Joshua,

My question is around manifestation events. Something that I regret that happened in my past is my cruelty towards my ex husband. I had a tone and condemning way around certain things with him for a number of years. I didn’t see the ugliness of it for years until he had enough and then I realized how cruel I was being. And then I had a handful of years learning how to love. But this ultimately was one of the reasons for the destruction of my marriage. Having a hard time finding that it was actually right. How can my cruelty be right?


Dear Cate,

The manifestation event was the end of the marriage. The perspective was that you perceived yourself as being cruel. The cruelty was always the urge to change conditions. You were living in fear. From the limited perspective, you wanted things to be different. You wanted him to be different. You wanted to feel things that you were not feeling. You wanted to be loved rather than simply expressing your love. In fear, you tried to control conditions through cruelty. It was derived from fear. Without the needing to feel something you did not feel, you could not be cruel, because this is not who you truly are. The manifestation event allowed you to see yourself from a new perspective and this is how it was for you.

It all worked out perfectly. You now know that you were operating from a stance of fear and acting on urges to control conditions. You can see this now from your new perspective. Without your husband leaving, you could not evolve to a new perspective and a new version of yourself. You would still be living that inauthentic life of fear and control. You truly wanted to see things from this new, elevated perspective. You wanted to know that you were living in fear so that you could adopt a new approach to life of love and acceptance. You wanted to really know that you were not living in love or being who you truly are. Now that you have expanded to a new perspective, you can choose to live from this point forward in love. You can choose to accept who you are now. The past version of you is no more. You have expanded and you will never be the same. That is the great benefit of this manifestation event.

You need not look back in regret, because you received all that you need to live life from this point forward in the full and complete understanding that you can now choose to live in love. Certainly, there will be fear and doubt, but you can move past this to live life in love and alignment. From where you exist now, you can choose a new path. It is the path of love. It is the path of self-discovery. It is your true path.

So now how will you live? Will you accept that the past was perfect? Will you choose to see it all as good and right? Will you let go of regret and live in appreciation for what actually happened? If so, you can move forward in love. You can become more of who you truly are. You can express your love to your ex-husband, to all others and especially to yourself. You are perfect as you are now. You can have, be and do anything from this new position of understanding and love. Move forward and let the past go. You are born again into the realization of how to approach life. You need not derive any feeling from controlling conditions. You must accept what is and let it all be good. If you can live in acceptance and love, without regret for the past (but appreciation instead), you will be guided toward the life you truly want. It all comes from the absolute acceptance of yourself in the moment, of the past as it was and of the future as it will unfold. Think about what you want now and be inspired in love to discover more and more of who you truly are.

The past was perfect. You do not want what you had, because something truer, more authentic and more magnificent is coming. It will only come to you from a place of absolute acceptance. Cultivate the feeling of love and appreciation for yourself, all others and the conditions and you will receive a perfect match to that feeling. Maintain the feeling of regret and you will continue to explore the unwanted in even more detail.

With our love,
We are Joshua