Hi, thank you so much for this opportunity!

I have been in a relationship for 3-4 years somehow knowing that it would not last, and it didn’t. He chose to leave and I secretly wanted to leave too but at the same time I was hoping that the relationship would get better. I know I was not wasting my time these years but I can’t help feeling stupid for staying in something where there obviously was no future. It was like I was fooling myself. I can’t really understand my own creation in this and why I had to be in this relationship. It was ok, I hoped for more but never got it. I taught him so much but don’t feel he taught me anything more than what I could learn without him. So my question is, why did I create this kind of relationship and had to “waste” these years ? I look forward to be with my soulmate but I don’t really know if I am doing this the right way… Help me get more clear 🙂

Thank you so much!

Dear Anonymous,

Time is an aspect of physical reality that causes you to see the world from a new perspective. Each day that passes brings with it a different perspective on life. As you grow older, your perspective is broadened. What you understand about your world now is quite more substantial than what you knew as a child. What you understand about relationships now is quite different than when you entered into it. Your perspective on this subject has broadened and that is a very good thing.

It is not possible to waste time in physical reality. What you are doing here, the purpose of your visit to this environment, is to expand through experience. Since all experience causes expansion, and all expansion is good, then this experience was good as well. It was certainly not a waste of time.

There is nothing for you to learn, however contrasting experiences do create a focus on what is wanted. From the ashes of one relationship rises the possibility of a more meaningful relationship. This is what you gain from this experience. You create your own reality from the contrast that was lived in the past. Now that you know what you do not want, you can create what is wanted. Forget the past and focus on what you want.

So then, as a result of this relationship, what do you seek in the next one? What feels good? What aspect of love would you like to explore? Are you looking for someone who loves you or are you looking for someone to love? Think about the attitude you are putting forth. Are you reserved and cautious or are you excited in anticipation? Which attitude will create an environment that will attract the relationship you want? Think about this for a while before you begin a new relationship.

Your past relationship was an exact match to the vibration you were emitting. You attracted this relationship whether you knew it or not. How you felt about yourself on the inside matched what was presented in this relationship. Now that you have altered your vibration, the relationship no longer exists. You changed your vibration based on the experience you had. You are now sending a new vibration. Are you consciously aware of what you are sending?

You will attract a partner who makes you feel on the outside how you already feel on the inside. It will be an exact representation of your current feelings. If you feel good, then the new relationship will make you feel good too. If you feel bad, then the new relationship will be similar to the last one. It is always up to you. How you feel is what you will attract.

Knowing this, it makes sense to wait until you feel better before you start to think about a new relationship. If you attract someone too soon, you’ll get one who is tuned to how you are being now. When you ramp up your vibration and focus on the positive aspects of love and union, you will attract someone who matches that. This is the way you use the powers of the universe to get what you truly want. Don’t ever expect the other person to be anything more than a reflection of your own feelings, beliefs and attitudes about love.

You are love and you are loved.