Dear Joshua,

I have smoked cigarettes for almost 13 years now, though I have never felt like a “smoker”. I take this to mean that smoking is not in alignment with who I really am. Is that accurate? And if yes, what limiting beliefs are causing me to remain a vibrational match to cigarettes?

I’ve identified, and have been working on releasing, feelings of shame surrounding my smoking habit, but I still find myself hiding the fact that I smoke for fear of judgment. I’ve also been growing into greater levels of self-love over the past year, and have trouble reconciling my desire to smoke with my increasing desire for self-love and self-care. I know a lot of people say the only reason they smoke is because they’re addicted. Thing is, I actually *really* enjoy almost everything about it (though I could live without the lingering smell). What gives? Do I just keep on smoking until it no longer feels good? What would it take for me to get to that point? If appreciate any insight you have to offer on the subject.

Thank you for all you do. With love and gratitude,


Dear Kyla,

There is no wrong anywhere in the universe and smoking is not wrong either. The fact that you smoke does not have anything to do with love of self. There are some feeling benefits that you receive through smoking. You desire to feel good and the act of smoking seems to make you feel good. What it is actually doing is allowing you to feel better. When you don’t feel good, maybe out of stress or boredom, you light up a cigarette and you feel better than you did before. It elevates your feelings the moment you decide to smoke and this is where the addiction lies. You are addicted to your ability to alter your emotional state, your feeling state, through smoking. But it doesn’t last.

You were meant to feel good. You were designed to have a baseline feeling that felt good. It is simply your habit of thought and your perception of the conditions around you that cause you to dip down into lower emotional states of being. Once you demand to feel good, once you realize that you’re just looking at life from a limited perspective, once you stop reacting negatively to the conditions around you, once you start believing that you have the power to create your own reality, you’ll begin to feel better more of the time.

As you start to feel better and your baseline feeling rises, you’ll no longer need the distraction that cigarettes offer. But until then, it doesn’t hurt to find a way to feel better. When you get tired of the yo-yo effect of feeling bad, then elevating that feeling through smoking, and feeling bad again, you might try something else. We suggest that you get control of your thoughts through meditation, inspiration, awareness and practice. Start thinking about how you feel. Start paying attention to the thoughts you’re thinking. Start rejecting negative thought and practice switching to positive, good-feeling thoughts. Practice thinking about things that make you feel good. Practice thinking about things that inspire you. Demand to feel good in every moment. Believe that you can and should feel good. View every event and condition from a higher perspective which allows you to feel good. As soon as you start to feel good again, cigarettes will lose their appeal.

You are loved and you are doing very well indeed.