Joshua,
Can you help me figure out this situation with my son and his school? I know from your last answer (and from experience) that once he has a chance to acclimate, he'll feel better about going, but today in the car we were talking about it and he has some serious fear going on. I was asking him questions, trying to help him pinpoint it, and he said something that struck me: "It all just feels bad on my inside. Everything about it, even the kids."
Let me tell you about this school for a second...it's fucking incredible. It's set on several acres of land, has two swimming pools, a sledding hill, all kinds of animals, and a director who says things like "At Raintree, we really try to teach the kids to question authority" twenty minutes into the school tour. It's literally the school of my dreams.
I understand that my son has his own path, with his own set of desires, but when I signed on to this school (and the hefty tuition bill that goes along with it) I felt in my gut like it was a place he would truly thrive. Was that correct? Will he come around eventually? When I heard what he said today, I felt fear, like maybe I'd made the wrong choice.
I know the fear was irrational, I even saw how maybe him hating this school and dropping out and attending public school could assuage some of the other abundance fears I'm having lately (how's that for a higher perspective?), but I would really love for this to be right for him and for our family. I guess since there's no wrong, then this *has* to be right. But still...
Another thing he mentioned was that he just wanted to stay home with his brother and I because he was afraid we'd have fun without him. I told him his brother mostly just sleeps while I do chores (which was a half-truth) and that we save most of the fun for when he gets home.
Is there anything else I can do to help him push through his fears? Or is this another one of those things where I have to do my best to sit back and not get emotionally involved in the life of someone who was literally grown in and pushed out of my body?
Thank you in advance for your insight. I'm already looking forward to the call on Wednesday (and have been since last week) :)
With love,
Kyla
Dear Kyla,
You know you cannot create in the lives of others, but you can and do influence them. You also know the difference between a rational fear and an irrational fear. You know that when something is inspired, then it is right to push through your fear and take action. In this case there are two parts to the story; you and your son. Let's talk about you first.
You feel fear when your son seems unhappy. You want to relieve that fear by taking some action to change his condition. The action that presents itself is not inspired, it is an urge. You know this because you are not in a high emotional state. You are in a low emotional state caused by fear. Action taken from this stance might make you feel better temporarily, but it won't help you get closer to where you want to go.
Your son is on his path. He chose you, this life, and ultimately knew that this school (or one like it) would be part of his path. He is coming into vibration sync with it, but he's not quite there yet. He's facing some resistance and this is causing him to focus on the negative aspects of the school. He's looking at this change from a limited perspective. He cannot see the road ahead. You know he will acclimate. That's the higher perspective which he cannot see from where he stands.
So what are you to do? The decision to enroll him in this school was inspired. That means it's beneficial despite your (or his) irrational fears. You can be comfortable moving through your fears. You can be an example to your son. You don't need to soothe him by trying to solve his problems for him. You can explain how the universe works and let him know that his vibration will soon be up to speed with this new school. As soon as it is, he will make friends and come to love everything about this school.
When you feel fear and feel the strong urge to change the outer conditions in order to relieve your fear, you must realize that it is a trick. Your ego is defending your persona. That's all that is happening. As soon as you analyze it and realize that it's just irrational fear, you'll feel better. As soon as your son acclimates to his new school, you'll feel better. You only want him to feel better so that you can feel better. Feel better now and you won't take action that might temporally take you off your path and influence him to go off his path.
Joshua
