Kate Question #39

 

Dear Joshua,

I got frustrated with someone (or two) at work this Friday. I asked someone to do a bit of work for me (reserve this train ticket) and she said that while she didn't really want to do it, she would... and I got cross. The thing is, this has been building up for the last few weeks. I've noticed one or two people just not wanting/being willing to do certain jobs. They will and do and I don't ask that often, but I'm getting frustrated that I have to be overly nice and polite and walk on eggshells to get something out of them which is their job anyway. So I'm trying to see what the fear and limiting beliefs are here for me to have reacted crossly.

Maybe the fear is that I will have to end up doing some of the work myself, but that doesn't sound right. Maybe my fear is that I'll have to continue to walk on egg shells and I find it tiring and I just want to be natural. Maybe my fear is that I will not love these people as much as I could because they are so annoying and I don't like feeling resentment. I know they are not super interested in their work. I know I get frustrated when someone asks me to do something (sometimes). Maybe my fear is that I should be way beyond this reaction, or that I'm not creating ease and flowing in situations but rather walking on egg shells. I do think that one of my limiting beliefs is that I will never "get" this (relaxation, ease, flow, deliberate creation, manifestations of success). But even while I write that, I realize how I'm not giving recognition to everything I have and do create on a daily basis, so that is just negative and needs to be turned around.

Kate


Dear Kate,

As you begin to strive to feel better and as you begin to become more conscious and aware of the mechanism of physical reality, you will really notice when you don't feel good or when you are fooled by a situation you believe you should handle better. This is okay. It's all part of the growth process. It happens to everyone and it will continue. This is a never-ending process of growth and expansion. Get used to it and try not to be too hard on yourself.

Again we will state that this is your universe and how people perceive you is a reflection of how you perceive yourself. You have a little work to do in this area. You are not recognizing the magnificence that is you. You have been fooled into adopting the very limiting belief that you are not the fullest and most powerful version of who you really are and so you behave as if you were less than that. It is a temporary illusion and you are working your way back to the full knowledge of who you really are. You are a strong and powerful being of pure positive love. Anything less than this is just a mere shadow of who you really are.

You have created a persona. It is your idea of who you are. You accept certain conditions as appropriate given what you think of yourself based on this fabricated persona. If your boss says something demeaning, you might accept it even though it's false. You believe that it is appropriate because he holds this position over you. If someone you believe is lower than you says the same thing, you take offense because you believe it is inappropriate. The thing is, it is all false. It is simply an inaccurate perception based on this false persona. You are not who you think you are. You are a magnificent and powerful creator baed in love. There is no fear in you. The fear guards against the loss of the persona.

You have a survival instinct which uses rational fear to protect your body from death or injury. Your persona uses irrational fear to keep your idea of yourself alive. It works well in certain situations. You do not allow others to take advantage of you or to treat you inappropriately based on the standards you've created through your persona. But your persona is not you, it is a much smaller version of you. As you are learning more about the reality of physical reality, your persona is changing and becoming more.

You are losing your old persona and adopting a new one that more accurately represents who you really are. When you become annoyed at someone, you feel bad in a new way. In the past, you would have felt bad and blamed it on the actions of the other person. Now you feel negative emotion and you realize that it is not them to blame, it is simply the limited perspective you are choosing. You are realizing for the first time that you are the one allowing fear to enter the equation and you have control over that. You are feeling bad because you think you should be more conscious, and this is an affront to your old persona. Your persona is protecting itself by making you blame the other person. The persona does not take responsibility. It believes it has already achieved self-actualization. Any attack on the persona triggers a defensive posture.

Now that you see what your dealing with here, you can understand how easy it is to fall into these situations. Your persona wants to blame the world for any suffering you may go through. You are beginning to realize that everything is created by you, therefore must take responsibility for the behaviors and actions of everyone around you. That's a daunting concept. It is hard to swallow. How on earth are you responsible for the way others see you?

Your outside world is a reflection of your inner world. If you don't particularly respect yourself, or respect others, they won't really respect you either. They cannot. They can't be anything other than what you expect of them. It's just not possible. You take the lead. You set the stage. You create the characters. You write the story. Is the story one where some people treat you well or is it a story where you accept the love that exists and you become the loving being that you are. There is no sense in trying to protect yourself.

You must love regardless of the feedback you receive. You are moving toward something huge and magnificent. You can't worry about what you'll get in return. You must know that you are here to express your love, so we suggest that you stop repressing it.

Now, what would the scene look like if you were being the pure being of love that you are. Imagine if you expressed your love. Imagine if you were a being of unconditional love. If they did something that was annoying, could you even feel annoyed. It would bounce right off you. You would not expect or want them to be any other way than how they were being because you are expressing unconditional love. If they were having a bad day, you would not try to manipulate them into behaving differently by being smug or giving them a disapproving look. You would be graceful, compassionate and find a fun way to get it done yourself.

If you were being the being of love that you are, people would fight amongst themselves for the pleasure of serving you.

You are love and you are loved.

Joshua

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