Emma Question #90


Hi Joshua,

I have had another realisation recently. It's around the idea that the universe will show you what you are willing to settle for. Me manifesting a guy not following through with his plans to catch up is showing me that I am willing to settle for a guy who doesn't show up for me like I desire. The fact that I manifested this and was willing to settle for this sort of thing is a reflection of my own self worth. If my self worth was higher, I would believe I was totally worthy of guys showing up for me and really making an effort with me, and I would not settle for anything less, but probably wouldn't manifest anything less anyway.

So this guy isn't wrong for not contacting me yet, he is simply acting as a helpful mirror to show me what I have got going on. Even the fact that I was worried about messaging him in the first place shows a lower level of self confidence in myself, because if it was higher I would only presume that he would be excited to get a message from me. And to be honest, I was willing to go into this catch up and then start a relationship with him again no matter how he showed up. That's definitely a manifestation of lower selfconfidence and a lack of trust in the universe to bring me what I really want. So I'm over it now! I will no longer settle for someone who doesn't show up for me. If he does end up organising this catch up I will still go and be warm and accepting of him as he is, but I will not just jump into a romantic relationship if he does not show up as the type of guy I really want. I will give him a chance and let him show me the person he is now, and if he is not a match I will be happy to remain friends.

So this whole thing has prompted me to re-examine my own level of self-worth and up it! I know I am awesome and deserve to be treated with respect and I will not accept anything less!


Dear Emma,

The universe will show you what you are vibrating in order for you to alter your beliefs so that you can become a vibrational match to what it is you truly want. What you truly want is to express your love. As a limitless being of pure positive love and acceptance, you want to express love in a limitless way, which means that you are not tied to how they love you or what their love says about you. What you think you want is something different and that is due to the influence of some limiting beliefs about yourself. Don't worry about that because limiting beliefs affect everyone in one way or another.

Certainly, the more worthy you feel, the more allowing you will become and this will allow you to stabilize your vibration when interacting with people in these situations. Remember, the universe always knows what you want and everything that comes to you is for you.

So yes, it is very good to maintain your vibrational equilibrium in situations such as this by understanding that you can accept what you are worthy of and that the other person is worthy of you. Of course, since all people are equally worthy, all people are worthy of your love. Therefore, everyone who comes to you is worthy of you and you are worthy of all others. If you feel worthy, it doesn't mean that you will attract someone who feels equally worthy, it means you will attract a vibrational match to how you feel about yourself. It never really has anything to do with the other person, the universe will bring you that which you are a match to. So raise your vibration with regard to your self-worth and you'll receive a match to how you feel about yourself.

If you worry about who the person is and how they reflect on you, or about settling for someone, or about the entanglement of two people over a long period of time, then that is what you'll attract and you'll have more encounters such as this one. He is a match to the wobbly vibration you have going on right now. It's still good because you get a chance to look at your vibration and make a conscious decision to approach this differently.

What do you truly want? A loving and happy relationship with someone you can be at ease with and have fun together. Does that sound right to you? Well then, this is easy to manifest. It's the most natural thing in the world. You can have that now. It's all the other stuff that you think you want or stuff you worry about that gets in your way. You have an ideal image that is based on proving your worthiness through the exterior conditions of a certain type of guy. Remember that this can't really happen in an attractive universe. You feel worthy and you'll attract a match to how worthy you feel. You feel ease, relief, and good, and you attract a match to that. If you believe that who you attract means anything, then you are right. It will always be a match to how you feel about yourself. If you feel good and worthy, you will attract someone who makes you feel good and worthy. If you feel apprehensive and doubtful, you'll attract someone who makes you feel apprehensive and doubtful.

ith our love,
We are Joshua