Emma Question #71


Hi Joshua,

Whenever I read answers from you where it appears you are telling me I need to loosen up on my idea of the type of guy I want, I feel negative emotion. I feel like you are telling me I am being unreasonable for wanting a guy who makes me feel a certain way, and that I have to try and force myself to be with guys who just feel "meh" to me. That just doesn't sit well with me.

I know what it feels like to be attracted to a guy I wouldn't normally consider my type or what I'm looking for, it happens to me all the time. Some guys just give me a certain feeling, it's an energy thing. I live in a reality that isn't really real, and I'm creating all of it. All possibilities of everything that could ever happen or exist are all happening right now, simultaneously, parallel realities. Anything that I can think of already exists. What I currently believe and focus on is what I am currently seeing in my reality, and I am able to change my focus and shift into a different reality.

If this lifetime can cause me to desire something, then it is possible for me to experience it in this lifetime. All desires are possible, and they already exist. I create my own reality. So then why would I just settle for guys who I am just not attracted to? When I could manifest a guy I am very attracted to? I don't have to settle. I am not asking for too much by wanting a guy who feels really good to me. I am not asking too much by wanting anything. And there is nothing keeping me apart from anything that I want other than my own focus and beliefs. I believe that if I can find a way to stop focussing and pushing against what's not right about my current reality, start focussing on the things that I like about my current reality, get excited about the things that are coming, and believe that they will come, then they will. I just need to stop telling these old stories like they are the truth, because that is what keeps making them appear to be true. I just need to tell a new story.


Dear Emma,

You are exactly right, but your resistance is not to the conditions that exist, your resistance is around the way the universe is bringing you what you want. You believe that the guy you want should come to you in a certain way, as a certain package, and look like the specific image you hold in your head. You are attached to something very specific. If the universe knows what you really want and how to bring it to you, then you must trust that you cannot know what it is you truly want because your perspective is limited. The fact that he's not here indicates that you have built up some resistance. That's what we are trying to show you. We are showing you how to ease your resistance. We are asking you to be more general. Can you see that now?

You absolutely can be, have, and do anything you truly want. However, you do not know what you truly want, you only know what you think you want. You have the idea of the feeling you want, but then you fix an image to that feeling and a create a mental path that will get you there. If your metal image and your path are too rigid, you'll miss all of the other possible paths because they won't resemble what you have created in your mind. This is a very common form of resistance.

Let's start at the beginning. You are a limitless being of pure positive love and acceptance. Your desire is to express your love. You do not need to be loved, because that would mean that your value of yourself is derived from how many love you and who loves you. You care about none of that. All you truly want is to love completely. All other people on this planet are pure positive beings of love as well. The only difference between who you really are and who you are being is the limits you place on yourself through fear. Without the existence of fear, you would live life as who you really are.

Without fear you could come to love anyone in a very short time because if you had no fear and they had no fear you would both be limitless beings of pure positive love and acceptance and you would unconditionally love and accept each other. Therefore, the only reason you would love one guy over another is because the first guy would cause you to feel less fear. If you met someone and felt no fear (or very little fear) you would fall in love with that person. If you meet a guy and feel "meh" about him, it is due to some fear. The fear is irrational and therefore false.

So what is the fear when meeting someone? If there was no fear, you would be able to express your love. If there was no fear, you would fall in love. This is what you must think about. Do you fear falling in love with the wrong person? Do you fear being trapped in a relationship? Do you fear commitment? Do you fear betrayal? Do you fear loss of love? If you harbor fear, you will find it very difficult to let down your guard. If you make it impossible for the guy you want to come to you, because you are holding onto fear, then you will maintain your resistance through the limitation of fear.

We ask you to think about a new approach to this subject and to life in general. Imagine that you live in a supportive and loving universe and all that you truly want will be brought to you the moment you ask for it and the moment you allow it. This is the actual and most basic design of the universe. As soon as you ask, it is given, and your work is to allow it. However, you do not necessarily need to ask for a specific thing, simply the feeling of what you want. When you ask for something specific, you hold a belief that it is only that specific thing that can bring you what you want. That is not the best way to go about manifesting your desire. The universe knows what you truly want, you just make up something you think will give you what you want. You want to love and be loved and so you concoct an image of what you think that will look like. However, what if what you truly want, the thing that will completely satisfy your every desire, looks totally different than how you've pictured it? What if you cannot imagine it from your current perspective because your current vibration is not yet a match to it? Well, we are here to say that this is the case in your case.

To be an allower is to be one who allows the manifestation of their desire to be brought forth in the most elegant manner possible. An allower allows for all possibilities. An allower is open and goes with the flow. An allower does not reject the way the universe brings her what she wants, but is open to all the possibilities. There is a path that will lead you to where you want to be, but the path looks completely different than the one you have in your mind. This is why you are not abel to receive that which you want. We will play a game with you. Have you ever heard of someone meeting their mate because they first dated the mate's friend? This happens all the time. It is one of the most common ways in which people meet. What if the one you want can only meet you because you accepted a date with their friend? Be open to more possibilities.

With our love,
We are Joshua