Allyson Question #98

 

Dear Joshua,

I have been doing well with seeing things as coming "for" me and working through limiting beliefs and fears.

Today, I received an email from a person I don't know. She had written an email about a month ago to ask two questions of my cycling club - as I'm secretary. I responded that I didn't know the answer and I would get back to her after I asked the Board.

Two days later I sent her a casual response on one of the questions as I had discussed it with others and so I just threw it out there. Now, three weeks later I get the most insulting, rude for no reason email from her. I was beyond shocked. Blame, names, etc. So the question is ... Why? I have been stewing over it for hours and not happy about it. Why did it come for me? What is the fear? What is the limiting belief? I've tried meditating, I've done a rampage or two.

Any guidance would be greatly appreciated!!
Allyson


Dear Allyson,

Fear. The fear is triggered by a limiting belief. Without this particular limiting belief, you could not choose the limited perspective, you could not come out of alignment and your inner self would not send you a message in the form of negative emotion. If you feel negative emotion, you perceive fear and choose to believe the illusion of danger that comes up for you. That version of reality you are subscribing too is an illusion and does not exist. It is being made up in your mind.

You have a persona that you have created as a result of the experiences of your life. This persona is often created unconsciously. You do not analyze your beliefs, you simply pick them up along the way. You have some empowering beliefs and some limiting ones. You allow these beliefs to define you. When the persona is attacked, the ego rushes to its defense. However, you do not need to have your persona defended, you need to dismantle it.

You believe you are good. That's limiting because the description of good cannot define you. Of course you are good, but you fear that others will not see you as good. You must defend that aspect of your persona. If this belief that you might not be good did not exist, you could not possible perceive the person as attacking you. You could not feel fear. You could not get angry. You would feel no negative emotion. This is just another manifestation event designed to alert you to a belief about yourself that is highly limiting. Will you address it now? Maybe yes and maybe no. If you choose to address it, if you choose to analyze it, if you choose to process it and reduce its intensity, then all that will happen is that you will not attract similar manifestation events and you be closer to becoming a match to certain unfulfilled desires.

You need to be seen as good. This is highly limiting. It makes you do and say things that are not an authentic representation of you. You do and say them only to be seen as good. This is a mechanism of control designed to create a favorable opinion so that you will be liked. However, that form of control cannot work. You cannot control others' opinions of you through actions. You control only your feelings and perspectives. You control the fear you feel or not. The control lies within, not with the outside conditions.

Give up your need to be seen as good, nice, capable, dependable, trustworthy or anything else. Do what you are inspired to do because it's fun and interesting, not because others will like you or appreciate you or think you're good. That doesn't matter. The only person you need to see you as good is you. You don't fully realize your own magnificence and so this causes you to be an inauthentic version of yourself. Why did you become the secretary of the club. It was to be seen as good, as a valueless part of the group, as someone who contributes. Are you really fascinated by the duties of secretary or did you become the secretary in order to manipulate public opinion of Allyson?

With our love,
We are Joshua

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