Dear Joshua,
I haven't asked anything about Forgiveness and it came up in a few readings this week.
A) What's the energy and good stuff with practicing Forgiveness?
B) How do we apply forgiveness to situations that are tough to do so?
C) How do we deal with our personal need for others to forgive situations that involve us (me)?
Thank you!!
Allyson
P.S. Did you have as much fun at the Land Cruise as all the attendees?
Dear Allyson,
You are a creator and so you create your own reality. As you know, you cannot create in another's reality and they cannot create in yours. So then, if another cannot create in your reality, you must take full responsibility for everything that happens in that reality, since it is all created by you, even if you believe it is not. If it comes to you, then it is for you. Nothing wrong can happen. If this is your perspective, then what is there to forgive? You can only forgive another if you perceive that they did something to you. However, if you perceive that the experience was for your benefit (even if you cannot recognize what it is at the moment), then you must thank them, not blame them. This is the new approach to life.
In the old approach to life, you might have used blame to take the burden of a limited perspective off of yourself. You might have used blame and resentment to reduce the fear you were feeling. You might try to control others through blame and then reward them (or yourself) through forgiveness. Don't get us wrong, forgiveness is a wonderful thing, however, it is based on the false premise that something was done to you, not for you. If you are living by the old approach to life, then forgiveness is quite healthy. However, if you subscribe to the new approach to life, forgiveness is unnecessary.
Let's imagine that you had a love interest when you were younger. You eventually broke up and you feel resentment toward that person because you believe he broke your heart. You want him to be different than he was. You want the experience to be different. You think that if he was different, then the experience would have been different. You would have felt less pain if only he had been nicer (or if you had broken up with him instead). Can you see that this is the old approach to life? The way the relationship ended was perfect because it allowed you to refine your preferences. You could have processed the fear differently had you known then what you know now. It is never the other person, it is simply the perspective you are choosing at the time and even now when you think about it.
There are two ways to process your fear. You can blame the other person and forgive them, or you can realize that you orchestrated the entire experience due to the vibration you were offering at the time. If you created it, how could you blame someone else? If it is your creation then it is for you and you can thank the other person for playing their part. Just because you do not understand how the event was for your benefit does not mean the event was wrong. It was right in every way. The same is true with anything you perceive that you did was wrong. It was not wrong. There is now wrong. It is all right and you are always right, even when you judge yourself as wrong. Therefore, there is no need to forgive yourself. By forgiving yourself, you are making yourself wrong. There is another way to look at it.
Imagine that you are the one who ended that early relationship. You are the one who broke the other person's heart. You caused them to feel intense emotional pain. But can you create in their reality? Can you make them feel anything? Of course not. They are responsible for the perspective they are choosing. They can choose to see that the end of the relationship at this time is perfect and that they will go on to meet someone else. They can choose to believe that the breakup is not a reflection of who they are or they can believe that they are lacking in some way and this is why you ended the relationship. If they believe that it means something negative about them, that is simply a perspective that their inner self does not choose and so they receive negative emotion as feedback. That's their emotional guidance system at work.
If you perceive that you could have behaved or acted in a different way, then you are fooling yourself. Once the moment has materialized in physical reality, it cannot be changed and therefore, it's perfect. There is no wrong and you cannot do anything wrong. It is all orchestrated by the universe. If you choose to believe that you could have been better in some respect, you are not seeing the whole picture. How you behaved at the time was due to the vibrations of all parties involved. That's all. It was perfect in every way. If you said something in a certain way and you believe it was unnecessarily harsh, you are not realizing that the other person attracted those words because it's what they needed at the time. How they choose to perceive them is up to them. It is their choice, just as it is your choice.
You create your reality. You choose your perspective. If you choose a limiting perspective, you will feel negative emotion. If you believe that someone did something to you, it is based on a false premise since you are the creator of your reality. All you are doing in these situations is choosing a limited perspective and receiving negative emotion as a result. In order to feel better, you might choose to forgive, but if you do that, you are choosing the old approach of victimhood. Instead, choose to see that the experience was expansive and right, even if you do not see it now. You will understand what it was all about later. Try to find the higher perspective in everything and you'll make it much easier to discover the message in the experience.
With our love,
We Are Joshua
And yes, we were thrilled to be a part of the land cruise and we had more fun than anyone. But, it's easy to have fun when you are always in alignment.
