Allyson Question #35

 

Dear Joshua,

What's with people's personality traits? Why do some people have such specific, repeated traits - some good, some just annoying to others?

I'm sure we can call this a Manifestation Event... I asked Rick to seal up a package I was returning and the label was already printed, it just needed to be taped on. He took the label into his office and took scissors and made the edges even with the black lines.

I had trimmed it - sloppy, but close and WHO CARES? Why would one not seal up a package if the margins around the label were not even and straight and who knows what else was in his mind?

He has to have everything even. Everything at a corner.(You should see our house!) Everything has to be straight. It annoys the hell out of me. Why? (OK, that's two in one questions...why does he behave that way and why does it annoy the hell out of me?)

I love things to be at angles... sideways, decorative, NOT even, NOT square and he has to have everything straight and even and if possible, on a corner.

I know this is heavy stuff...life altering...but it drives me nuts!

Thank you for "straightening" me out!
Allyson


Dear Allyson,

We are not here to straighten you out, that's Rick's job. Rick has you as well. You make his straightness wrong and he makes your angles wrong. Sounds like a perfect "match" to us. What are the odds? 100%

You see in him what you lack and that is nice. He sees in you what he lacks and that too is nice. However, when you feel like he is making you wrong or that you cannot live up to what you perceive his expectations might be, then that is what drives you crazy. You see, it's just your persona. You feel attacked and so your ego protects your version or idea of self. Your ego's job is to make you think that you are good and everyone else is wrong in those times when you perceive that your idea of self is being attacked as wrong.

When you believe that someone sees something that is wrong about you, especially when the person is close to you, it causes you to feel fear. Actually, what is happening is that you are choosing to perceive the situation in a way that is different from how your inner self sees the same situation and as a result you are given a message from your inner self. That is what the fear is. It's a note from your inner self saying that you are looking at this from the limited perspective. You perceived that Rick was making you wrong for not trimming the edges properly. That was not the case at all. If it was, that is his issue and his manifestation event and has nothing to do with you. If you did not take your perspective away from your inner self's perspective, you could not feel fear.

Here is the higher perspective that your inner self is seeing. "Allyson is a limitless being of pure positive love and acceptance and so is Rick. We see Allyson and Rick as perfect as they are. We can see that Rick likes things to line up and Allyson likes angles and that is perfect for it is differences like these that helped them to become attracted to each other in the first place. Look at Allyson trying to cut the edge straight. What a good try. Look at Rick fixing it right in front of her. How cute. Don't they make a wonderful pair. Perfectly matched."

If this was your perspective (which it often is) you would not feel fear because you would not consider Rick's actions as an attack. If your persona was more pliable and flexible, you would not feel fear because you would see things from the higher perspective. You would not interpret his actions as an attack on you, because you would not define yourself by how well you cut a label. You would not label yourself a good labeler. That would not matter to you in the least. If he criticized you for being a bad ballet dancer, would you even care at all? You're not a ballet dancer. You're not a label cutter. You think it defines you, but if you were to look at it, you would realize your fear is irrational.

You can appreciate yourself for who you are and it will never matter what Rick thinks about you. If you perceive his actions as an attack against who you are, then you have a few choices. You can increase your idea of who you are so that others cannot define you, you can realize that it has nothing to do with you, you can ask the other person to be different than they are, or you can leave. Pick one of the above choices and things will change. We suggest you choose from the former choices rather than the later ones.

With our love,
We are Joshua

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