Dear Joshua,
Do I have to see someone as "different" before that person will be different in my reality? For example, I've been trying to shift my feelings for my neighbor from fear to love. If I imagine him being friendly neighbor, that helps in trying to find positive feelings towards him. Also, my theory being that after I imagine him being friendly, he would be that way in my reality, correct?
But then I'm just back in the trap of conditionality, since it's easy to love someone who's nice. The challenge is loving someone who is being a dick (but really being the perfect neighbor to help me on my spiritual path). So how do I truly get on a path of being able to love him unconditionally? And if I'm able to get to that state, do I have to spend time with him? Aren't there just some people on the planet that you might love, but don't "click" with?
Thanks!
Steve
Dear Steve,
When we use the term "love" we are referring to your connection with source. As you love someone or something you are connected to your source and you are aligned with the energy of universal forces. You are moving toward what is wanted and you are becoming who you really are. When you see someone and feel fear, you disconnect yourself from the powers of the universe, what you want, and who you really are. So there is only to ways to be: 1) in love, or 2) in fear.
When you look at your wife, you see many things that help you connect with your source and it makes you feel good. You would call this love and you feel it is an appropriate feeling when looking at your wife. You are supposed to love your wife and you do. But there are a few aspects of her that you would change. These are the aspects you fear and when you see these aspects you cut yourself off from source. You would change these aspects if you could and that would allow you to feel better (connected to source) more often.
But it is not the negative aspects of your wife or your neighbor that cut you off from what is wanted, it is always you. You can love when the conditions are right. When they are right, you experience no fear, but when the conditions are wrong, you experience fear and you are temporarily disconnected from source which causes negative emotion and you feel bad.
So what to do? How do you learn to keep yourself connected to source so that you maintain your good feelings? It's all in your mind. Train your mind and learn to see the positive aspects of everyone and you'll lessen the amount of fear that exists in your reality. This is unconditional love.
Unconditional love is really the absence of fear regardless of the conditions. You could call it courage, but we would call it controlled thinking. When you learn to control your thoughts, manage your emotions, and see your world from the higher perspective, you reduce the amount of fear in your life.
So think about this for a moment. When you find yourself in an argument with your wife, who you love, and you experience something in her you do not like, what does that represent? It always represents fear. Fear that the relationship will end. Fear that you are not who you think you are. Fear of change or loss. Fear of whatever. You cannot argue or see something as wrong without fear being present. You cannot argue when you feel love because there is an absence of fear. You cannot see wrong unless fear is present. Without fear there is only love. Love can only see everything as right.
When you think about your neighbor, you experience fear. You might call it another name, but it's just fear, plain and simple. What is it about your neighbor that you fear? There's something there, but it's irrational, wouldn't you agree? So release the fear and what is left is love. That's all there is love or fear. One or the other. Sometimes love and sometimes fear. Back and forth.
Learn to control your thoughts and you'll control your fears. You have nothing to fear that is real. It's all made up. Once you release your fears around other people and about yourself (your persona), love will enter in a more pronounced way. You'll start to want to be around those you love. Since you have no fear, since your controlling your thoughts, you'll no longer avoid the ones you love. You'll click with everyone.
You are on a rocket ship and you're traveling at light speed. Hang on!
Love,
Joshua
