Dear Joshua,
I think I'm starting to get this... Today I intended and generally had a fun, busy, easy day. I even appreciated the rain (for a while - lets not push it). I remembered to intend at certain moments, but also, there were moments when I slipped into negativity but what I was proud of was that I was quite quickly able to feel the dip, look at the thoughts and ratchet myself back to remind myself that all is good, that nothing is wrong, that I've got this....etc. I don't really remember, but one thing you said in a recent answer which helped me today was - I need to change if I want things to change - and take more risk (I'm misquoting) and relax and one of the big changes I'm aware I need to make is exactly that - let go of the negativity (fear) thanks to the trust that the more I do that, the more it will work out, no matter what it looks like in the moment. And I had a good day.
I'm hoping (intending?) that I can keep this up - this ratcheting back to remember to relax, laugh, no big deal - its all ok. And you are right that things are good right now - and these are precious moments. I'm having more awareness - more in the moment moments.
It's still work, but even the work (of looking at my thoughts and working with them to improve them) felt interesting and successful today. Of course, part of me is thinking this was just a "lucky" day of growth - can this go in bursts and stops? Does it depend on the person? But here again, I'm thinking that would be a manifestational event which, if I can catch it, I can work on. Could I forget all this learning and fall back to my old ways? I don't think so, and I'm not even sure why I'm asking?
Kate
Dear Kate,
No you can't regress. You've already learned to much. There's no going back now. It's too late. Your completely stuck with what you know.
Certainly there will be times when you feel like you're making great progress and times when you feel stalled or even moving backwards. But even in the monuments of feeling stuck, you're actually moving. It's just that you're gaining a new perspective and you're in a whole new place. Your expectations are higher now. You want to rush ahead to the finish line and get this all over with and done. But there is no finish line and you never get it done. It's a continual process of growth and expansion. There is no end, so all you can do is enjoy the journey.
One moment of feeling good is your reward for all this work. That's it. That's the sum total of your efforts. If you feel good for one moment more than you would have, you're a complete success. Feeling good more of the time is the only benefit to any of this. However, as you're well aware, feeling good in a reality where how you feel is the only thing that matters is the ultimate goal. Nothing else even compares.
When you begin to feel good more of the time, you'll want to keep feeling good more of the time. You'll get used to it. It will become addicting. You'll expect it. You'll consider it the norm. It will get better and better and better. Your vibration will rise. You'll gain momentum. And then one day something will happen and you will put on the limited perspective and you'll feel bad. You'll feel really bad. You will think something has gone haywire with the whole system. It might be a little thing and you'll completely freak out. Why does such a little thing feel so bad? Because you've become accustomed to feeling good and when you feel good most of the time, feeling bad really sucks.
Feeling bad is supposed to feel really, really terrible. You're supposed to notice it. However, you've gotten used to it to a degree. When you were a child, you were not used to feeling bad and so when you felt bad, you screamed and cried and threw temper tantrums. You were a pure positive bundle of joy and you felt really good most of the time. But when something terrible happened, like you got hungry or sleepy, you burst into tears because that felt horrible compared with the bliss you were feeling the rest of the time.
Over time, as you encounter negative emotion and choose not to analyze it, you become desensitized to it. You consider negative emotion to be part of life. Sometimes you feel good and sometimes you feel bad. That's just the way it is. In reality however, feeling bad is part of your guidance system and you are supposed to stop, analyze the situation and correct your perspective. You not meant to keep looking at the subject from the limited perspective.
The more you grow and expand, the more contrast you'll experience which will cause you to create new desires and challenge old beliefs. As you go with the flow, you'll reduce your resistance and you'll feel good most of the time. In those infrequent moments of resistance, you'll feel negative emotion in a very strong way which will cause you to take notice and work on the limiting belief or perspective. The fact that you appreciate feeling good and fear feeling bad means you're already way ahead of the game. Congrats.
Joshua
