Kate Question #112

 

Dear Joshua,

When two people in a couple both want somewhat different things, is the best solution to appreciate what is right now, take life a day at a time and see what unfolds (following inspiration - going with the flow), while the universe works on both our desires for the perfect solution? I would imagine this is the case.

With love,
Kate


Dear Kate,

The two people you speak of are in a relationship because they are a vibrational match to each other. This means they want a lot of the same things. If they truly wanted different things, they would not be a match and would not be a couple. There are far more common wants in a relationship than it may appear on the surface. Most of the wants are general in nature. They want to be happy, harmonious, free, loving, successful, bonded to each other, and supportive. They have common values and beliefs. They have a shared idea of what the relationship means.

If they want different things, these things are more specific. The general commonalities of the relationship usually outweigh the specific desires and the couple remains a couple. When one person believes their desires cannot be met within the framework of the relationship, and they believe they must leave the relationship to pursue the desire, they are simply taking action to make something happen.

The vast majority of your desires are possible within the framework of the existing relationship. It's just that you cannot see how it is possible because your perspective is limited. Allow the universe to grant you all that you desire. It will figure out the details. There's nothing for you to do other than have a little faith and appreciate the good aspects of the relationship that exist now.

You can have anything you want. Anything. You don't have to figure it out. All you have to do is allow it to come by not resisting it by focusing on the fact that it isn't here yet. It will come, but you can't force the issue. By believing it is not possible, you enter the state of resistance and you keep it away from you. By trying to make it happen on your own, you enter the state of resistance and you keep it from coming to you. By realizing that you do not have to want the same things, you enter the state of allowing.

Fear is the only reason you think you should want the same things. If you were not a match, you would not be together. You are a match and so is the sum of your desires. You just perceive them to be mutually exclusive, but they are not.

Joshua

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