Allyson Question #8

 

Dear Joshua,

Authentic Self. In my mind - this might be my Inner Self in physical reality. But I'm guessing that's not necessarily the case. So many pieces to questions about Authentic Self...and the questions change directions as I read and think about it.

You've said; I can't lose when I become an authentic version of Allyson.

So this first question would be... How do I "BECOME" an authentic version of Allyson?

You've used terms such as "vibrational match" and "center of my own universe." Is this where the authentic Allyson resides? Or do I experience vibrational match when I Become the authentic version of Allyson?

I sorta get that if I'm 'acting' like someone I'm not - i.e., faking my personality, that's being inauthentic. If I'm nice or on time or polite (these are important beliefs) then I am 'more authentic' but somehow that doesn't feel like the answer to "authentic Allyson". I trust I have not confused you - but I am confused!

When I 'become' my Authentic Self - does that mean I have a higher perspective on all things? Am I a then a fully expanded being when I am my Authentic Self? (Whatever that means, I'm not sure.)

Thank you, Your Friend,
Authentically Confused Allyson


Dear Allyson,

By the broadest definition, the authentic self is the physical representation of your true self. It is you without fear. It is you in pure love and acceptance. You are not being any different than who you really are; a limitless being of pure positive love and acceptance. As you apply fear, you move away from who you really are. As you remove fear, you come closer to the authentic representation of who you really are.

When you return to nonphysical, you will step into your authenticity and be who you really are because in the nonphysical realm, fear does not exist. In the physical, there is fear, yet most of it is irrational. Live a life without conforming to the influence of fear and you live an authentic life. Practice removing the limiting effects of fear and you are essentially practicing living an authentic life. That's all it is.

Fear causes you to be different than you really are. It causes to modify yourself in order to exist within the narrow confines of fear. This is evidenced by the adoption of certain personality traits in order to mange a life consumed by fears of all sorts. You try to be someone who will be liked, who is seen as good, responsible, patriotic, reliable, interesting, loving, etc. Certainly, these are all good traits (for there is no wrong), yet these traits are not authentic because they are forms of identity compiled for the sole purpose of coercing others into liking you or loving you. When the act breaks down and falls apart, the false sense of love you believed you were receiving goes away.

This was all taught to you during childhood. It was taught to your parents and their parents. You were all taught to conform. Your schools created an atmosphere of conformity. Your workplaces often create environments of conformity. You believe that in order to be loved, you must fit in. In order to fit in, you cannot express yourself as an individual. Those who do are punished through the removal of love and the use of punishment. If you were punished as a child, you were told you were wrong. You were asked to be different than you were. You accepted this because you wanted love and so to control the conditions, you behaved in a way that would coerce those around you to love you. You behaved, did what you were told, and played nice. All of that was an act and it was an inauthentic version of you created out of fear of loss.

The authentic version of you does not need to be loved, it needs to love unconditionally. You truly desire to accept the conditions, including your perception of yourself and everyone else, unconditionally. That means you love yourself despite any aspect of you that does not conform. You accept yourself as perfect as you are and you love yourself unconditionally. If you see yourself making what others might perceive as a mistake, or transgression, you accept that act as perfect because it fits perfectly into the condition that presented itself at the time. If you say something that might be considered by others to be inappropriate, well that is their judgment and it is based in fear. You can accept that the comment was perfect, because it was meant to be heard by those who heard it and how they felt as a result is their own manifestation event. It was the perfect thing to say at the perfect time and you were inspired to say it and so you said it. You accept that the statement was perfect, that your feelings about it were perfect (even if you feel bad about it), that everyone else had the perfect response to it, and that no wrong occurred in the saying of it. It was all perfect. That's the unconditional acceptance of the conditions, yourself, and everyone else. That is authenticity.

Inauthenticity is the opposite of who you really are. Who you are not is a limited being of conditional love and conditional acceptance. The inauthentic version of you loves and accepts others as long as the conditions are right. This is the old approach to life and it forces you to attempt to control the conditions by being different than you are so that others like you. You also ask others to be different than they are so that yo can feel good. But worst of all, you ask yourself to be different than you are by adopting traits that you believe will make you a good person for the sole purpose of creating this persona that others will be able to love. The more lovable you become, the more inauthentic you become, because it is just an act to get attention and love from other people.

Who you really are asks nothing of others or of yourself. In fact, who you really are can only love and accept others as well as yourself. You don't need them to be different than they are for you to feel good. You feel good no matter how they are being because they cannot create in your reality and thus, you don't invite fear. You maintain your good feelings regardless of the conditions knowing that in an attractive universe everything you want unfolds from this state of allowing. You allow yourself to be whoever you want to be, while having no fear that you are being wrong. Without that fear, or the perception of wrong, you can perceive other people's opinions of you in a way that is authentic and this allows you to feel good.

The authentic and empowering way to perceive how others see you might sound something like; "I am a limitless being of pure positive love and acceptance. I do not need others to like or love me. All I choose to do is love and accept others for who they truly are even if they are feeling fear. How they perceive me is irrelevant because it is perceived through the lens of their fears and I have no control over that. If they like me, it is because I present no fear in this moment. If they don't like me, it has to do with how they perceive fear as it relates to their interaction with their own unique perception of who they think I am, but it is not who I really am that they see."

When you say something nice to someone, it can be authentic or inauthentic. It depends on your motivation. If you are saying it because you feel good and you are inspired to say it, then that is authentic. If you are saying it in the hope that they will see you as nice and like you, well there's nothing wrong with that at all; it's just not authentic. It's still nice and it might make them feel good, but it's inauthentic because it is an attempt to coerce them into liking you.

There's is nothing wrong with being inauthentic. It is certainly one very popular approach to life. It's just that it's limiting and does not work within the laws of the universe. Sometimes it's hard to see how being good is limiting, because you've been taught that it is good to be good, and of course it is. However, if you look at the motivation behind that idea, you will discover why you are being good. If the behavior is a subversive form of control, then it's limiting because it won't really be effective in the long run. If the behavior is done because it was inspired from a place of feeling good, then the behavior may be considered wrong by others, but it conforms perfectly to the laws of the universe and as a result it will always be for your highest good, no matter the results.

Living an authentic life begins by understanding the motivation behind the behavior and then acknowledging those occasions when the behavior is meant to control or maneuver another person into a certain response or action. Authenticity comes from allowing the other person to be who they are and managing all behavior through the process of receiving and acting on inspiration by resolving fear where the only motivation is self-expression and unconditional love.

That's quite a lofty ideal, yet it can be put in practice in your daily life. Once you are aware of the basic concept of authenticity, you can become aware of the motivation behind your behavior and you can think about what you are doing as you are doing it. The more aware you become, the more you can understand the intentionality of your actions and the actions of those around you. Are the actions based in fear or love. That's all you'll need to know. If the action is based in fear, it is inauthentic. It is designed to cause someone else to do something or be something that is coerced by the behavior.

Getting good grades in school so that your parents will be proud of you is inauthentic. It's not wrong, it's simply not authentic. Getting good grades as a result of your interest and delight in the subject is authentic because, there is no ulterior motive behind it. It is just the natural result of your interest and love for the subject matter.

With our absolute and unconditional love for you,
We are Joshua

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